tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-213739962011-07-07T19:15:25.306-07:00Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.comBlogger981100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-51424571104110387742010-01-12T06:47:00.000-08:002010-01-12T06:48:07.194-08:00

On his trip to Great Britain, George Bush had a meeting with Queen Elizabeth. He asked her, "How does one manage to run a country so smoothly?" "That's easy," she replied, "You surround yourself with intelligent ministers and advisors." "But how can I tell whether they are intelligent or not?" You ask them a riddle," she replied, and with that she pressed a button and said, "Would you please send

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-61501734186683338382009-12-24T06:53:00.000-08:002009-12-24T07:02:56.086-08:00

Aj tak gets news that 100 sardars are killed in a train accident atamritsar station.Only one sardar left alive.The correspondent goes to him and asks the sardar ji.Correspondent: How did it happen?Sardar: oh ji pucho mat.. sab kuch sahi tha sab log platform par khadegaadi ki wait kar rahe they. Achanak announcement hui ki shatabdeeexpress 2 no. platform par aa rahi hai.Jaise hi sab ne suna ki

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Some Men Are Really Thrifty (SMART)A Chinese man walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loanofficer. He tells the loan officer that he is going to China on businessfor two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.The bank officer tells him that the bank will need some form of securityfor the loan, so the Chinese man hands over the keys to a new Ferrariparked on the street in front of the

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-41774594798476272002009-12-07T06:36:00.000-08:002009-12-07T06:37:50.152-08:00

A Chinese walks into a bar in America late one night and he saw Steven Spielberg. As he was a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph. Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap and says, "You Chinese people bombed our Pearl Habour, get outta here." The astonished Chinese man replied, "It was not the Chinese who bombed your PearlHarbour, it was the Japanese". "Chinese,

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-63887519819972217942009-02-19T10:42:00.000-08:002009-02-19T11:00:38.559-08:00

I think they'r biased...Response:They're also wrong. :{)

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-62076858934307803162009-02-09T06:44:00.000-08:002009-02-09T06:46:10.787-08:00

Boys:1. Drive to the bank, park and go to the Cash Dispenser.2. Insert card3. Dial code and desired amount4. Take the cash, the card and the slipGirls:1. Drive to the bank2. Engine stalled3. Check make-up in the mirror4. Apply perfume5. Manually check haircut6. Park the car - failure7. Park the car - failure8. Park the car - Success9. Search for the card in the handbag10. Insert card, rejected by

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-53649516447879547672008-07-30T08:33:00.000-07:002008-07-30T08:40:38.374-07:00

This theory will win the Physics Nobel Prize in 2008! Equation 1 Human = eat + sleep + work + enjoy Donkey = eat + sleep Therefore, Human = Donkey + work + enjoy Therefore, Human - enjoy = Donkey + work In other words, Human that don't know how to enjoy = Donkey that work ============ ========= ========= ========= ========= === Equation 2 Men = eat + sleep + earn money Donkeys = eat + sleep

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-37924704773711763502008-06-05T09:23:00.000-07:002008-06-05T09:24:18.676-07:00

WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee. Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week. Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl. And her husband is on the back of the milk carton. Keep reading-they get better!!! WOMEN'S REVENGE "Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-11962722218310200372008-05-08T12:37:00.001-07:002008-05-08T12:38:32.849-07:00

John was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind ofunusual gimmick. One day, John came home early with a newrobot . . not just an ordinary robot, but a Lie Detector. Hetold his wife that it had to charge 4 or 5 hours and he couldshow her how it works.At 6 PM, Tommy, their 11 year old son, came in from school,nearly 3 hours late - both parents were understandably angry.'Where have you been?

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-11886637685281073522008-05-03T12:36:00.000-07:002008-05-03T12:37:06.636-07:00

An elderly Chinese woman had two large pots, each hung on the ends of a pole which she carried across her neck.One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water.At the end of the long walks from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived only half full.For a full two years this went on daily, with the woman bringing home

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-69918853095004104952008-04-25T15:00:00.000-07:002008-04-25T15:01:19.993-07:00

A boat docked in a tiny Mexican village. An American tourist complimented the Mexican fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took him to catch them. "Not very long," answered the Mexican. "But then, why didn't you stay out longer and catch more?" asked the American. The Mexican explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet his needs and those of his family.

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-29053439102500495222008-03-24T09:21:00.000-07:002008-03-24T09:29:23.651-07:00

This is for men and women(who have a sense of humor). If you as a woman, do not have the required sense of humor, please read no further. You are going to hate this! Disturbing Beer NewsYesterday, Texas A&M University scientists released the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. Men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption. The

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-40279537962365503722008-03-16T17:03:00.000-07:002008-03-16T17:52:22.725-07:00

Contributed By: Dheeraj Aryal aka Dheeru bhai

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-26863353497547372262008-03-09T22:55:00.001-07:002008-03-09T22:55:52.095-07:00

(Why you should make sure you think before you speak!) The priest in a small Irish village loved his chickens that he kept in the coop behind the church. One Sunday morning before mass, he went to feed the birds and discovered that the cock was missing. He knew about the cock fights in the village, so he decided to question his parishioners in church. During mass, he asked his

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A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she placed an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand. Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-35300628774577182022008-02-24T11:24:00.000-08:002008-02-24T11:25:34.311-08:00

You Just Might Be A Taliban If.....You refine heroin for a living, but you have moral and religiousobjections to beer...You own a $900 machine-gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can'tafford shoes...You have more wives than teeth...You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide...You've ever opened a can of falafel with a mortar round...You've ever had your camel repossessed...

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-83530757924458613892008-02-04T08:34:00.000-08:002008-02-04T08:39:57.000-08:00

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Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-27529829622546699322008-01-12T13:57:00.000-08:002008-01-12T14:00:07.400-08:00

Twelve Italian priests were about to be ordained. The final test wasfor them to line up in a straight row, totally nude, in a garden whilea sexy, beautiful, big breasted, nude model danced before them.Each priest had a small bell attached to his weenie, and they weretold that anyone whose bell rang when she danced in front of themwould not be ordained because he had not reached a state of

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-22314933826510433192008-01-12T13:56:00.000-08:002008-01-12T13:57:03.571-08:00

After serious & cautious consideration.....your contract of friendshiphas been renewed for the New Year 2008. It was not a very harddecision to make! Now, don't screw it up! My Wish for You in 2008 --May peace break into your house, and may thieves come to steal your debts.May the pockets of your jeans become magnets for $100 bills.May love stick to your face like Vaseline, and may laughter

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A six-year-old boy told his father he wanted to marrythe little girl across the street. The father, beingmodern and well- schooled in handling children, hid hissmile behind his hand."That's a serious step," he said. "Have you thought itout completely?""Yes," his young son answered. "We can spend one week inmy room and the next in hers. It's right across the street, so I can runhome if I get

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-48515889326321491262007-11-04T09:38:00.000-08:002007-11-04T09:39:32.551-08:00

Once you have opened this e-mail, there's no turning back. Below are truedescriptions of zodiac signs. Read your sign, then forward it on, withyour zodiac sign and label on the subject line. This is the real deal,try ignoring or changing it, and the first thing you'll notice is havinga horrible day starting tomorrow morning - and it only gets worse fromthere.VIRGO - The Perfectionist Dominant in

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The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom makinglove to a very attractive young woman."You disrespectful pig!" she cried. "How dare you do this to me - afaithful wife, the mother of your children? I'm leaving you. I want adivorce!"And Paddy replied "Hang on just a minute, Luv, so at least I can tellyou what happened.""Fine, go ahead", she sobbed, "but they'll be the last

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-6781398604926165292007-08-30T17:08:00.000-07:002007-08-30T17:13:28.768-07:00

Please tell me...Is it Friday Yet??

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-62312101339016738852007-08-29T12:46:00.000-07:002007-08-29T12:54:55.854-07:00

I had a chat with your mom.She showed your Childhood photo !!!I took a copy for my album.Hmmmm..... Oh no. You are So So So cuuuuuuuuuuuuteAnd.............. I wish I was there then to hold you...............................................HHHHHHHHHMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMYou haven't changed that much ~:he he he he he................................. cant stop laughing

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-37752854373110155912007-08-22T14:37:00.000-07:002007-08-22T14:38:08.017-07:00

-----Sardar at bar in New York.Man on his right says "Johny Walker single"Man on his left says "Peter Scotch single"Sardar says - "Baljith Singh Married"************ ********* ********* ********* ********Prince Charles & Sardarji were having dinner.Prince said, "Pass the wine you divine".Sardar thinks "how poetic"Sardar says, "Pass the custard you bastard".************ ********* ********* *******

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-8337793014832593802007-08-22T14:34:00.001-07:002007-08-22T14:35:55.243-07:00

When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to takeit out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know. Take it outon someone you don't know.I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I'd forgottento make. I found the number and dialed it. A man answered, saying"Hello."I politely said, "This is Chris. Could I please speak with Robyn Carter?"Suddenly a manic

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1174550292014053012007-03-22T01:52:00.000-07:002007-03-22T01:58:12.026-07:00

Perhaps one of the most interesting words in theEnglish language today is the word fuck.Out of all of the English words that begin with the letter "F",fuck is the only word that is referred to as the "F" word.Its the one magical word, just by its sound can describepain, pleasure, hate and love.Fuck, as most words in the English language,is derived from German, the word "Fleichen", which means to

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1160542750724820162006-10-10T21:54:00.000-07:002006-10-10T21:59:10.743-07:00

A father enters his daughter's bedroom and sees a letter on the wall over the bed. With the worst premonition, he reads it, with trembling hands: It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm telling you that I eloped with my new boyfriend. I found real passion and he is so nice, with all his piercings,

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1160207028270572212006-10-07T00:33:00.000-07:002006-10-07T00:43:48.283-07:00

Technorati Profile

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He was 80, she was 20. It was the stir of the town when an 80 year old man married a 20 year old girl. After a year of marriage she went into the hospital to give birth. The nurse came out to congratulate the old man saying "This is amazing. How do you do it at your age?" He answered, "You've got to keep that old motor running." About a year later the same young bride gave birth again. The same

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1159163410602908632006-09-24T22:47:00.000-07:002006-09-24T22:50:10.626-07:00

A little boy goes to his father and asks "Daddy, how was I born?" The father answers: "Well son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a private room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to

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"IT'S A GUY THING" Translated: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical." "CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?" Translated: "Why isn't it already on the table?" "UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR" Translated: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

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Three nuns were talking one sunny day in June. The first nun said, "I was cleaning in Father's room the other day and do you know what I found?A bunch of pornographic magazines!" "What did you do?" the other nuns asked."Well, of course I threw them in the trash," she replied.The second nun said, "Well, I can top that. I was in Father's room putting away the laundry and I found a bunch of

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It was April and the Aboriginals in a remote part of northern Australia asked their new elder if the coming winter was going to be cold or mild. Since he was an elder in a modern community he had never been taught the old secrets. When he looked at the sky he couldn't tell what the winter was going to be like. Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he told his tribe that the

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Rajiv and Mona are flying to Australia for a two-week vacation to celebrate their 40th anniversary.Suddenly, over the public address system, the Captain announces, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines have ceased functioning and we will attempt an emergency landing. Luckily, I see an uncharted island below us and we should be able to land on the beach. However

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International symbol of marriage is Approved by the UN New York -AP- After 5 months of heated debate, the Commission of Human Rights of the United Nations has approved the new International Symbol of Marriage.

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Boudreaux was bragging to his boss one day, "You know, I knoweveryone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and Iknow them." Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff, "OK,Boudreaux, how about Tom Cruise?" "Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it."So Boudreaux and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on TomCruise's door, and sure enough, Tom Cruise, shouts,

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"A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in bed. She goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front of him.He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee."What's the matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room."Why

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A man dies and goes to hell. There he finds that there is a different hell for each country. He goes to the German hell and asks, "What do they do here?" He is told, "First they put you in an electric chair for An hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then The German devil comes in and beats you for the rest of the day." The man does not like the sound of that at all, so he

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Charlie was fixing a door and he found that he needed a new hinge, sohe sent his wife Mary to Home Depot.At Home Depot, Mary saw a beautiful teapot on a top shelf while shewas waiting for John, the manager, to finish waiting on a customer.When John was finished, Mary asked "How much for the teapot?"John replied, "That's silver and it costs $300.""My goodness that sure is a lot of money!" Mary

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The UN conducted a worldwide survey. The only question asked was:"Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?"The survey was a huge failure. In Africa they didn't know what 'food' meant; in India they didn't know what 'honest' meant, in Europe they didn't know what 'shortage' meant, in China they didn't know what 'opinion' meant, in

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There was this couple that had been married for 20 years. Every time they made love the husband always insisted on shutting off the light.Well, after 20 years the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figures she would break him out of this crazy habit. So one night, while they were in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session, she turned on the lights. She looked down and saw herhusband was

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1155116179792567292006-08-09T02:23:00.000-07:002006-08-09T02:38:12.500-07:00

Here is the second part of "Math is so obvious!!".Enjoy....

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The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The pastor was sopleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and itwon again. The local paper read: PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT. The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that heordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race. The next day, the local paper headline read: BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS. This was

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1154505281640663772006-08-02T00:48:00.000-07:002006-08-02T00:54:41.643-07:00

I recently picked a new primary care physician. After two visits andexhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing "fairly well" for my age. Alittle concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him,"Do you think I'll live to be 80?" He asked, "Do you smoke tobacco or drink beer or wine?" "Oh no," I replied. "I'm not doing drugs, either." Then he asked, "Do you eat rib-eye steaks and

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1154504865540681602006-08-02T00:45:00.000-07:002006-08-02T00:47:45.560-07:00

Keep this philosophy in mind the next time you either hear, or areabout to repeat a rumor.In ancient Greece (469 - 399 BC) Socrates was widely lauded for hiswisdom. One day the great philosopher came upon an acquaintance whoran up to him excitedly and said, "Socrates, do you know what I justheard about one of your students?""Wait a moment," Socrates replied. "Before you tell me I'd like youto

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1154361501316337112006-07-31T08:54:00.000-07:002006-08-22T02:27:13.390-07:00

Funny Video

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1153377430486102222006-07-19T23:34:00.000-07:002006-07-19T23:40:35.390-07:00

One big step for the ladies, another hole dug for man! :-)One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash hisSweat-shirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, heshouted to me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?""It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"He yelled back, "University of Oklahoma."And they say blondes are dumb...-----------------------

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1152769705747089962006-07-12T22:36:00.000-07:002006-07-12T22:48:25.763-07:00

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1152427322631417852006-07-08T23:34:00.000-07:002006-07-08T23:51:26.590-07:00

A Professor at one of the IIM's (INDIA) was explaining marketingconcepts to the Students:-> >> >> >> > 1. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am very rich. Marry me!". - That's Direct Marketing> >> >> >> > 2. You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says: "He's very rich. Marry him

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1152105021284049342006-07-05T06:02:00.000-07:002006-07-05T06:10:21.316-07:00

[One day you send a letter to your boss asking for an increase in your salary ! ] Dear Bo$$ In thi$ life, we all need $ome thing mo$ t de$perately. I think you $hould be under $tanding of the need$ of u$ worker$ who have given ! I am $ ure you will gue$$ what I mean and re $pond $oon . Your$ $ incerely, [The next day, you received this

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1151909116103035922006-07-02T23:28:00.000-07:002006-07-02T23:45:19.870-07:00

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1151306074587564432006-06-26T00:12:00.000-07:002006-06-26T00:14:34.590-07:00

O lny srmat poelpe can raed tihs. cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1151305762622796662006-06-25T23:23:00.000-07:002006-06-26T00:09:22.646-07:00

A very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walks into Wal-Mart withher two kids in tow, screaming obscenities at them all the way throughthe entrance.The Wal-Mart Greeter says, "Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart ....Nice children you've got there - are they twins?"The ugly woman stops screaming long enough to say, "Hell no theyain't, the oldest one, he's 9 and the younger one, she's 7. Why

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1150781658177572542006-06-19T22:26:00.000-07:002006-06-19T22:34:18.216-07:00

"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope." Camille Paglia"Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eightare unimportant." George Burns"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a wholerelationship." Sharon Stone"Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for blackmen. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps." TigerWoods"My

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1149768723242912592006-06-08T05:06:00.000-07:002006-06-08T05:12:03.260-07:00

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1149768126946617992006-06-08T04:57:00.000-07:002006-06-08T05:02:06.946-07:00

You are driving down the road in your car on a wild, stormy night when you pass by a bus stop and you see three people waiting for the bus:1. An old lady who looks as if she is about to die.2. An old friend who once saved your life.3. The perfect partner you have been dreaming about.Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing that there could only be one passenger in your car?

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1149767764868598172006-06-08T04:46:00.000-07:002006-06-08T04:56:04.870-07:00

An American, a Brit and an Iraqi are in a bar one night having a beer.The Yankee drinks his beer and suddenly throws his glass in the air, pulls out a gun and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, "In the States our glasses are so cheap that we don't need to drink from the same one twice."The Brit obviously impressed by this, drinks his beer, throws his glass into the air, pulls out his gun

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1149766900386106612006-06-08T04:36:00.000-07:002006-06-08T04:41:40.390-07:00

A woman comes home from the hypnotist and tells her husband, "Remember those headaches I've been having all these years? Well, they're gone." "No more headaches?" the husband asks, "What happened?" His wife replies, "Margie referred me to a hypnotist. He told me to stand in front of a mirror, stare at myself and repeat 'I do not have a headache; I do not have a headache; I do not have a

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1149766457903667372006-06-08T04:27:00.000-07:002006-06-08T04:34:18.290-07:00

Question and the Answer given by Candidates oh sorrythey are IAS Officers now.Q.How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floorWithout cracking it?A. Concrete floors are very hard to crack! (UPSCTopper)Q.If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, howlong would it take four men to build it?A. No time at all it is already built. (UPSC 23 RankOpted for IFS)Q.If you had three apples and

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1149745174416883242006-06-07T22:38:00.000-07:002006-06-07T22:39:34.430-07:00

A man sees a woman getting chased by a dog in chandani chowk area of New Delhi.When the dog is about to bite the woman, the man intervenes and kicks the dog.A Times of India reporter was seeing all this. He said"That was great.I'll definitely publish this in our newspaper. Tomorrow the headline will be 'LOCAL HERO SAVES LADY FROM A DOG'."The man replied "Thank you, but I'm not from here. I

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1149398013238507552006-06-03T22:10:00.000-07:002006-06-03T22:13:33.260-07:00

1. Coca-Cola was originally green.2. The most common name in the world is Mohammed.3.The name of all the continents end with the same letter that they startwith.4. The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.5. There are two credit cards for every person in the United States .6. TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters onlyon one row of the keyboard.7. Women blink

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1148797195644942462006-05-27T23:15:00.000-07:002006-05-27T23:21:30.426-07:00

My wife dresses to kill. She also cooks the same way. -Henny Youngman> My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. -Rodney Dangerfield> A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. -Milton Berle> I bought my wife a new car. She called and said,"There was water in the carburetor." I asked her, "Where's the car?" She replied, "In the lake." -Henny Youngman> The

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1148796844402590362006-05-27T23:12:00.000-07:002006-05-27T23:14:04.416-07:00

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.George: Great. Lay it on me.Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.George: That's what I want to know.Condi: That's what I'm telling you.George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?Condi: Yes.George: I mean the fellow's name.Condi: Hu.George: The guy in

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1148451771451163562006-05-23T22:42:00.000-07:002006-05-23T23:22:51.493-07:00

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1146555734992834462006-05-02T00:37:00.000-07:002006-05-02T00:42:15.006-07:00

Little Johnny went up to his father and said, "Dad, the teacher gave us an assignment to determine the difference between potentially and realistically. Can you help me?"The father thought for a moment, then answered, "Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Then ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars, and then, ask your brother

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1146480897895838062006-05-01T03:25:00.000-07:002006-05-01T03:54:57.910-07:00

hi here are the links to best jokes collected by university of berkeley.http://shadow.ieor.berkeley.edu/humor/And this is a chat bot. Its really interesting.http://www.pandorabots.com/pandora/talk?botid=f5d922d97e345aa1Check these links!

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1146223627921892862006-04-28T04:23:00.000-07:002006-04-28T04:27:07.936-07:00

Operator : "Thank you for calling Pizza Hut . May I have your..." Customer: "Heloo, can I order.." Operator : "Can I have your multi purpose card number first, Sir?" Customer: "It's eh..., hold..........on......889861356102049998-45-54610"Operator : "OK... you're... Mr Singh and you're calling from 17 Jalan Kayu. Your home number is 4094! 2366, your office 76452302 and your

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1145445153185044562006-04-19T04:09:00.000-07:002006-04-19T04:12:33.203-07:00

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey. He invited all his neighbours to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first,

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1145249358103186652006-04-16T21:46:00.000-07:002006-04-16T21:51:45.876-07:00

LHS=RHS (proved by Sudeep)

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1145249026466797662006-04-16T21:40:00.000-07:002006-04-16T21:43:46.483-07:00

If you cannot decipher anything, then try pulling the corner of your eyes as if you were Chinese. It works!

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1144348743892427262006-04-06T11:35:00.000-07:002006-04-06T11:39:03.913-07:00

A jobless man applied for the position of "office boy" at Microsoft. The HR manager interviewed him then watched him cleaning the floor as a test. "You are employed." He said.” Give me your e-mail address and I'll send you the application to fill in, as well as date when you may start." The man replied "But I don't have a computer, neither an email.” I’m sorry", said the HR manager,” If you

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1144058644646243482006-04-03T02:59:00.000-07:002006-04-03T03:04:04.666-07:00

Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror asher ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his handstogether at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to rollaround in agony.The woman rushed down to the man, and immediately began to apologize."Please allow me to help. I'm a physical therapist

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1143801202405059992006-03-31T02:26:00.000-08:002006-03-31T02:33:23.003-08:00

Here’s a list of some funny URLs, where the designer didn’t think about how people would read the name of the site: Who Represents? A database for agencies to the rich and famous: www.whorepresents.com Experts Exchange. A knowledge base where programmers can exchange advice and views: www.expertsexchange.com Looking for a pen? Look no further than Pen Island:

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1143627040140694992006-03-29T02:09:00.000-08:002006-03-31T02:46:09.866-08:00

An old man lived alone in Minnesota. He wanted to spade his potato garden, but it was very hard work.His only son, who would have helped him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and mentioned his situation:Dear Son,I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won't be able to plant my potato garden this year. I hate to misdoing the garden, because your mother always loved

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1143373834856021882006-03-26T03:45:00.000-08:002006-03-26T03:50:34.876-08:00

Guy gets on a plane and finds himself seated next to a cute blonde. He immediately turns to her and makes his move. "You know," he says,"I've heard that flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger. So let's talk." The blonde, who had just opened her book, closes it slowly and says to the guy, "What would you like to discuss?" "Oh, I don't know,"says the guy.

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1142929519983778682006-03-21T00:22:00.000-08:002006-03-21T00:25:20.003-08:00

Johnny wanted to screw a girl in his office.....but she belonged tosomeone else...One day Johnny got so frustrated that he went up to her and said "I'llgive you a 1000 dollars if you let me screw you...." but the girl said"NO".Johnny said "I'll be fast, I'll throw the money on the floor, you benddown, I'll be finished by the time you pick it up." She thought for amoment and said that she would

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1142927855796273802006-03-20T23:56:00.000-08:002006-03-21T00:02:02.426-08:00

We've all heard about people having guts or balls. But do you reallyknow the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed,the definition for each is listed below...GUTS - is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, beingassaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask: "Areyou still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?"BALLS - is coming home late after a

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1142404428748358102006-03-14T22:28:00.000-08:002006-03-14T22:33:48.760-08:00

How do you recognize a Sardar in School?He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erasesthe board.Once a Sardar was waking he had a gloves on one hand and not on other sothe man asked him why did he do so. He Replied that the weather forecastannounced that on one hand it would be cold and on the other hand it wouldbe hot.A Sardar is in a bar and his cellular phone rings.

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1140938650422518822006-02-25T23:09:00.000-08:002006-02-25T23:24:12.343-08:00

Q: Why do boys go to temples? Becoz temple is the only place where u can find.. Pooja Bhawna ShraddhaAarti Archana Aradhana Shanti Jyoti .......... ....... ... AND Finally.....TRIPTI..... Contributed By: Amit Sharma

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1140590059064593922006-02-21T22:26:00.000-08:002006-02-21T22:34:19.066-08:00

Why it's better to be a Woman!1. We got off the Titanic first.2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.3. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.4. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.5. We can cry and get off speeding fines.6. We've never lusted

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1140589442899354922006-02-21T22:15:00.000-08:002006-02-21T22:24:02.926-08:00

Bill Clinton and his driver were cruising along a country road one night when all of a sudden they hit a pig, killing it instantly. Bill told his driver to go up to the farmhouse and explain to the owners what had happened. About one hour later Bill sees his driver staggering back to the car with a bottle of wine in one hand, a cigar in the other and his clothes all ripped and torn. "What happend

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1140068354369522502006-02-15T21:37:00.000-08:002006-02-15T21:43:05.196-08:00

Four Catholic ladies are having coffee together, discussing howimportant their children are.The first one tells her friends, "My son is a priest. When he walkinto a room, everyone calls him "Father."The second Catholic woman chirps, "Well, my son is abishop. Whenever he walks into a room, people say, 'Your Grace'."The third Catholic woman says smugly, "Well, not to put you down,but my son is

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1139730450937850232006-02-11T23:43:00.000-08:002006-02-11T23:47:30.940-08:00

Sardar: I haven't slept all night in the train.Friend: Y?Sardar: Got upper berth.Friend: Y didn't u Xchnged?Sardar: oye, there was nobody 2 Xchng in the lower berth...Sardar tells a girl "Come 2 my house at nite, nobody will bthere............. Girl goes at night & realy nobody was thereATeacher lecturing on population - In Indiaafter Every 10 sec awoman gives birth to a kid. A Sardar stands up-

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1139729003181693022006-02-11T23:11:00.000-08:002006-02-11T23:51:31.000-08:00

To realizeThe value of a sisterAsk someoneWho doesn't have one.To realizeThe value of ten years:Ask a newlyDivorced couple.To realizeThe value of four years:Ask a graduate.To realizeThe value of one year:Ask a student whoHas failed a final exam.To realizeThe value of nine months:Ask a mother who gave birth to a still born.To realizeThe value of one month:Ask a motherwho has given birth toA

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csLetter by Sardarji's Mom,Vahe Guru. I am in a well here and hoping you in the same well there. I'm writing this letter slowly, because I know you cannot read fast.We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen 20 miles from home, so we moved 20 miles. I wont be able to send the address as the last Sardar who stayed here took the house

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1138864870628531282006-02-01T22:39:00.000-08:002006-02-01T23:21:10.666-08:00

Memory was something you lost with ageAn application was for employment A program was a TV showA cursor used profanityA keyboard was a pianoA web was a spider's homeA virus was the flu A CD was a bank accountA hard drive was a long trip on the roadA mouse pad was where a mouse livedAnd if you had a 3 inch floppy . .... you just hoped nobody ever found out!Contributed By : The DOC

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This photo is a very rare one, taken by NASA. This kind of event occurs once in 3000 years. This photo has done miracles in many lives. Make a wish ... you have looked at the eye of God. Contributed by: Binaya Bashukala

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A little guy is sitting at the bar just staring at his drink for halfan hour when this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him,grabs his drink, and gulps it down in one swig. The poor little guystarts crying."Come on man, I was just giving you a hard time," says the truckdriver. "I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man crying.""This is the worst day of my life," says

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I Love this DOCTOR!!!! HEALTH QUESTION & ANSWER SESSION Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true? A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster.

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1138090442111432952006-01-23T23:47:00.000-08:002006-01-24T00:14:02.143-08:00

Contributed by: Pramod Chand

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1138030039053165762006-01-23T07:22:00.000-08:002006-01-23T08:06:03.400-08:00

Some W a c k y Quotes Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and itseems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for anhour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'Srelativity.- Albert EinsteinThe brain is a wonderful organ. It starts workingthe moment you get up in the morning and does notstop until you get into the office.- Robert FrostThe trouble with being punctual is that nobody'sthere to

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21373996.post-1138006458210682102006-01-23T00:51:00.000-08:002006-01-23T00:54:18.220-08:00

A drunk walks out of a bar with a key in his hand and he is stumbling back and forth. A cop on the beat sees him and approaches "Can I help you sir?" "Yessh! Ssssomebody ssstole my carrr" the man replies. The cop asks, "Where was your car the last time you saw it?" "It wasss on the end of thisshh key" the man replies. About that time the cop looks down and sees the man's 'personality'

Pradeep Chandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01687521832201033426noreply@blogger.com0